I’ve wanted to work on a reverse poem for a while. I finally sat down and made it happen. I have many themes in my head but this one is perfect for the poem structure. By reading down and back up, you journey with me “out of the fog” to face the “wound”.
“Coming out of the fog” is a phrase adoptees use when we begin to confront the reality of how adoption has impacted us. It’s a non-linear experience of grief and loss that can begin at any time in an adoptee’s life. Some adoptees never experience this.
The “wound” refers to the Primal Wound theory by Nancy Verrier, which states that even if a child is separated from the first mother the moment it is born, the infant will register that as trauma in their body, in their nervous system. Though an adoptee like myself may not have a conscious memory of that stress or my struggle to survive without my biological mom, the wound is there. Acknowledging that is part of healing.
Thanks for reading.
Title: Fog & Wound By Tiffany Lavon Adoption is beautiful. I can’t honestly claim that I need to grieve I don't need sympathy Focusing on my blessings Is how I grow, not Lamenting a loss before memory Truth is I should always be grateful It is actually harmful to imply Adoption is inherently traumatic My adopted family Is a deeper part of me than My ancestral heritage Which will never be part of my life The bond with my first mother Does not eclipse My adopted mother's love I have no doubt that This was God's Plan A I can't imagine how My life could be different. [read in reverse, line by line]
Better will not be Not for them if not by me Not-all-men will not all sacrifice Not-all-white-people will not all open their eyes Pushing my hopes into their future dreams is just passing the stuck of our present reality naming better evolves naturally claiming hate fades as life cycles Not-all-them is not any relief I must show mine how to blend action and belief Must summon all that I already am to cultivate all that they already are but can’t harvest yet I must make better now in me around me not just for them but with them so that by them better we'll be