This is a 600 word nutshell explaining what Calling in the Wilderness is all about, and inviting you to enter in. The tl;dr is this: I’m using my voice to challenge our beliefs about adoption, race and faith so we can be better humans and better Christ-followers.

Calling in the Wilderness

I created Calling in the Wilderness after my former website was reported and banned from social media. With help, I got it un-banned, but that’s a story for another time.

This frustrating experience brought up a lifetime of being silenced on certain topics and feeling like certain parts of my identity were supposed to be invisible. I used to internalize these things, believing I had nothing of value to say or offer. This time, however, I won’t back down, but I will be smarter about how I share my content. And share I must.

God has given each of us a message that others need to hear.

I believe this; that God designed us to see things differently. When all our voices are heard, we see things we wouldn’t have otherwise. We even help one another see God more fully!

My message and perspective are not appreciate by everyone, but they hold truths that need to be heard. Especially at the intersection of adoption and race.

I Live in the Wilderness

Literally; my physical home is hidden away in the Oregon wild where complete stillness naturally occurs and mountain lions roam. I also live in a figurative wilderness; my life circumstances (see the Warning Label) have caused me to see things differently from the dominant culture around me. And yes, that feels lonely and dangerous sometimes.

So I spent much of my life contorting to fit the expectations of white Christian culture, until God called me into a wilderness season.

Enter In (Entering the wilderness)

In the Bible, Moses, Paul, and Jesus had wilderness experiences; a time of deconstruction and questioning, experiencing the depths of human emotion. Their wilderness prepared them to rely on God through controversy and conflict, and ultimately fulfill their role in God’s plan.

In my wilderness, everything I thought I knew about being adopted, about race, what the Bible said and how I perceived God, began to unravel. Everything changed.

I had to rely on God to confront the things I’d ignored; the other half of my story, the painful stuff that makes people uncomfortable. And God did not abandon me in my rage or despair, but proved faithful.

In this wilderness, I realized that my role is to let God use my story, my uncommon perspective, to show us things we wouldn’t otherwise see.

The Wilderness Lives in Me

This wilderness lives in me as an ever present conviction to speak against the lies I formerly believed, in spite of what it costs me. Here, I invite you to challenge your beliefs about adoption, race and faith along with me. Some of you will find my content abrasive and you’ll feel called out. Some of you will resonate with it and you’ll feel called in.

It may be silly, but I also hope that by making my process public, my “calling in the wilderness”, I can encourage others (especially adoptees) in their wilderness and embolden them to share the message God has entrusted to them.

Get started with these posts:

Fog & WoundAdoptee poetry.
Adoption is Not GospelOn the biblical metaphor for salvation.
Seeing Internalized RacismA series on how this manifests in BIPOC.
Christians And RacismCommon obstacles to addressing racism.
Grieving BirthWhen I began to question everything.

Up Next: How you can help.

Want a tangible way to support my work and other adoptees who are creating content?